i was like the pretty and slutty 8th grade girl who goes to a party, gets wasted, and ends up having sex with a senoir
details?
alcohol + bed + penis = sex
I can't lisssten to Lou Holtzsss ssspeak anymore
You put a nerf gun to his head and demanded him to take you to taco bell..
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
you were passed out in your cheese fries by the time he brought out your second order of french toast.
When she was giving me head last night it felt like there was a NASCAR pit crew working on my dick.
He honestly told me my belt was "supercute" when we started hooking up. I would be the girl to find the only straight man in the world that uses the word "supercute".
Well u missed Autumn's newly 21 yrs old sister flashing her tits and standing on the bar last night.
Why is my hat full of peanuts?
Don't throw them out, I'm on my way
I know now that the cab driver can get me a 10 dollar blow job. I'm practically a local.
If there's one thing I learned yesterday, it's that if I really wanted to I could be mayor of Toronto.
If you don't turn up on horseback dressed like a highwayman I am not having sex with you today
Remind me to do laundry tomorrow so i have something decent to take off when i get laid.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
It's 3 am. Nothing I've tried can get the taste of failure and vomit out of my mouth.
Randomize
