I'm too scared of my Fleshlight to even use it anyway.
We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
you left with a lisa lampanelli lookalike... i hope she was atleast funny
been sitting in chapter for 25 minutes. drinking last night's franzia out of a XXX vitamin water 10 bottle. recruitment chair has no idea. life is good.
why is pumping your own stomach in your searches on youtube?
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Some guy just stopped me in the bar and asked if I had a shot named after me at another bar called God damn my VaJana hurts? He already knew my name was Jana so I couldn't deny it!
All I could think about when I saw her was that she could be the mother of my future first round draft picks
He came when he saw that my nipples were pieced
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
He's in the hospital yelling at his brother to at least have stuck something "normal" up his ass.
Again?
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
I love 4am trips to the ER. I feel so responsible for actually making it all the way here.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
woke up. showered n got ready. had sex. and was still 15 minutes early to work... its gonna be a good day!
Randomize
