WORST DINGLEBERRY EVER
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
Had a student tell me he misses the old Four Loko. He's in 7th grade. No one is allowed to claim I started drinking too young ever again.
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Just got flashed by an entire bus of girls in school uniforms. We then had to wait beside each other at a light. It was awkward.
Figured out how I got so much alcohol in my hair: tried to drink my drink using my cleavage as a cup holder. Missed my drink hole and got it all in my hair
He passed out in the car on the way to the party. Seabiscuit tripped before the race even started....Lil bitch....
You're wrong. It's my BIRTHDAY. We all know it's impossible to get pregnant on my diva day!
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
He told me he sees me like a sister then 10 mins later tried to make out with me.
Sorry about the nipples in that snapchat. It was meant for the Australian.
Im selling my dirty underwear to pay for that cruise. NO JUDGEMENT . I love you lol ❤❤ also dont tell anyone
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