you really need to stop walk of shaming home from theme parties.
Ahhh... Adderall running out my nose in the shower really brings back memories.
she kicked me out for pissing in the recycling bin. I mean, is it really THAT big of a deal?
I ended up giving him head, i think it was mostly a defensive move so that he wouldn't discover i was wearing those onesy spanx
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I just want to be covered in whipped cream and spanked, is that too much to ask?
I puked and rallied in front of a cop...and then waved at him....
I'm done, I have no more memes or ways to ask for nudes, so yeah
He's not put together enough to have that big of a dick
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
He was married to his college girlfriend for 20 years. Just give him the blow job he’s been fantasizing about since last century and he’ll be wrapped around your little finger
Randomize