A little girl and i are having a face making battle in mcdonalds
She started it, but I totally finished it.
It's like sleeping with someone you met at a karaoke bar. It's never okay.
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
shes 19, drunk and said she has no gag reflex. im trying to decide if i have scruples
you dont
i dont
yea im pretty sure it has something do with my love of forearms...
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
I’m doing tequila shots with lesbians. This isn’t how I planned my night but I’m not complaining
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
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