Apparently I ran up to the group of cookie-cutter blonde chicks and screamed "Delta Gamma Nuuuuuuu!" really excitedly and tried to hug them and share fake sorority stories with them.
Finished drinking tea out of a red party cup when I was done I flipped it without even thinking
I got a Luke Skywalker costume so I can go do battle with the homeless guy who plays the fiddle dressed as Darth Vader downtown.
And he was super vague about his life, it was frustrating. I totally boned a homeless guy, didn't I?
I think the name vodka for a girl is amazing
Don't make it weird, I don't think about you when I'm climaxing, it's just that I see you rooting me on.
He ate shrooms at 9:30, said, "see you later," and left. I am alone on New Years.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
I told him if he cums in my mouth he has to buy me a cake that says "sorry I came in your mouth"
There is a special place in Hell for whichever one of you put Ben Gay on my dildo. It was a very uncomfortable April 1.
it was like teleporting. everytime i opened my eyes, i was somewhere different... usually the floor.
He sent me a picture of a gas station condom and said "we probably shouldn't use this but if I was to impregnate someone on accident I'd want it to be you"
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I just didn't expect to have anal in a retail store at 9 AM on a Tuesday.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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