How is it? Sketchville?
cheap drinks and peanuts cancel out any form of sketchiness
it was like she was tryin to eat my face and i was defending myself with my mouth
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
I'm on my fifth double. This night is getting better whether it likes it or not.
So you plan on doing double washing machine sex? Like. A double date. But with sex. On a washing machine..?
we just finished a porn and sex toy shopping spree. this is the fun part of "being serious"
Sweating vodka and spray tan, I feel like a trophy wife.
I started having a bad trip because I closed my eyes and got lost in a forest of patterns and I knew my mom would be upset.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
she's the poster child for how alcoholism can be fun.
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I mean seriously there comes a time when you just need to take a crap in peace. Until he figures that out he can stay the hell outta my place.
I know EXACTLY where things went wrong with her...I didn't use Cheetos as a wooing tool.
i left you alone for two hours TWO HOURS & when i got back i had to rush you to the hospital because you were covered in Smooth Away pads & drinking the bong water..
Well, I just puked in the shower in case anyone wants an update on how my day is going
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