Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
So is chris hansen cool in person? Or is it just awkward while you wait for the cops?
Goddamn it, are you fucking her sister?
did you know it's going to storm tonight?
You bitch. At least tell Laura she's a better kisser.
So he said if we had sex he'd take me to Build A Bear. My virginity is so worth a trip to build a bear.
You're 20.
IT'S BUILD A BEAR!
please tell me you remember why "7 days" is written above my bed in red marker
I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Come on. It's already happy hour in Europe...Man up. "I'm at work" and "it's a tuesday" are not valid excuses.
I'm using my ex boyfriends dog to find a guy at the park I could see fuck buddy potential in. I'm the queen of irony.
He offered to buy me free breakfast if I stayed at the hotel overnight with him. I then realized they have a complimentary breakfast.
I'm wearing sunglasses around my house. Douchebag status. The hangover is real.
it was one of those unspoken contracts of silence like "I teach your daughter and you work at a strip club"...I don't tell if you don't
You drunk-dialed me and asked me to describe my burrito
Is it appropriate to send an apology gift to his roommates for breaking the bathroom sink during crazy sex?
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
Married dude I had an affair with 10yrs ago was at table next to us at dinner last nite. My mom asked him to take a pic of us & then commented how cute he was as they left. Do I tell her he’s got a huge D too?
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