I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
Pat told us he showed us his penis because he's "a nice guy".
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
Jesus, I just want to drink. Also simultaneously punch things and rub my vagina on them.
First sex of the summer I'm winning 1-0
GET HOME NOW
Oh shit
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
Wanna have a sleepover and take me to court in the morning?
Uh I almost got the bride to go down on me. I'm the smoothest maid of honor ever.
And the sexual frustration is like I'm wearing a damn horcrux
Ugh I feel like I just got hit by a big giant sex bus.
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Randomize
