I woke up and there was 3 different size condom wrappers on the floor. What is this goldie locks and the 3 condoms???
A slipped finger up the butt isn't the end of the world
Why is everyone in the bowling alley looking at me like i'm a prostitute just because I have bunny ears on?
Dipping doritos in Grey Poupon. Why does no one treat me like the lady I am?
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
I have mastered the 3 minute room cleaning drill in preparation for the nights possible slam-piece
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Side note: the physics of a guy my size and age getting laid in the backseat of a Toyota Camry are absolutely staggering
She drunkenly dropped her ranch for her pizza. She tried to clean it up with her hands off the street then realized it didn't work and started licking her fingers.
FUCK the WHO, FUCK cancer, I'm gonna eat fucking bacon.
I forgot to tell you that he serenaded me with "Fuck Her Gently" by Tenacious D. And I didn't hate it.
Kinda. I got kicked outta the bar, and then incited a riot until the cops came and I bailed
we promised ourselves we wouldn't get too drunk, and what happens? I wake up the next morning with half a mcdouble in one pocket and some barbie clothes in the other.
Questions: How did Rachel get home? Why did I find both her ID's in my shoes? And does anyone know if she's alive?
Randomize
