But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
is it really this hard to find a guy i can fuck and have a good time with who doesn't ask where things are going btwn us?
you sound like my dream girl
New high or new low? Cat walked into the bathroom while I was taking a #2, looked @ me, sneezed and walked out..
Why are we friends again?
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
well we are all hammered and my parents are reminiscing about all the times they drove us home drunk from Christmas
Oh my god what did I do. My hands are scraped, there are pickles on the floor, my clothes are wet, and I don't remember how I get here. Thank you.
That girl next to you randomly said that she fits into a queen sized pillow case
WTF.
It was all good till you had ppl chasin shots of ciroc with fucking applesauce
I woke up with your vibrator in my face
He knows whenever I get drunk I'm going to call him and make fun of his major. Its like a reverse booty call.
Your mankini haunted my dreams.
My walk of shame is starting to become positively reinforcing; I stop by Starbucks and when I leave I look someone just heading to work.
he had to stop me from eating snow off the street on the way back to pick up our cars. that's how hungover i am.
we found her. shes in the bathtub full of raw pasta. i dont even know...
the sex is SO much better when he thinks im going insane
Randomize
