dude i just saw a drunk guy attempt to get by IUPD and throw a uprooted bleacher seat over the edge of the stadium. funniest thing of life.
details please.
they caught him 10 rows from the top. the first thing he said was "wait I can explain, i just have to throw this over first."
They made my facebook status "I got my period!!!." Every guy I've had sex with at college liked it.
There's so much relief when you realize you wake up in your own bed
I DONT WANT TO PLUS I THINK I FLUSHED MY KEYS DOWN THE TOILET WHILE I WAS PEEING
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
I mean Grimace is basically just a big piece of purple shit and he is loved way more than the hamburglar just to put it into perspective
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
Did I run into a tree or get punched in the face?
Both.
I don't know if apple cider everclear was such a good idea
There. Isnt. A. Single. Person. Who. Is. Not. High. At. Church.
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
woke with Taco Bell next to me in bed and people's shoe sizes written on my arm.
He keeps singing a song about someone called the dayman.
....fighter of the Nightman?
I woke up and couldn't find her. She had somehow managed to get into the closet and lock herself in. She was crying for her boyfriend. Thirsty Thursday at its finest
Just filed for child support I hope he gets the paperwork on Father's Day
Randomize
