I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
You kept shouting "Relax and take notes" every time before you would hit the blunt
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
He wasn't there when I woke up so I left him a heart shaped line before I left.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
There were two girls and a guy on a bed and now i can put porn director on my resume.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
lets do drugs on my lunch break tomorrow
Thanks for your faith in my ability to stay sober while writing final essays. It's...unearned.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
We had sex on the tiger blanket while I was wearing my Ukrainian shirt and my ass touched the Ukrainian flag. Happy 25th Ukraine!
Girl I'm contemplating picking up some adult diapers. That's how bad this is and it's only day 2.
This reminds me of the time you were crying and puking in the toilet at that party while i did shots of tequila in between blow drying your feet. miss you!
For someone who's supposed to be gay Greg is really good at seducing me into things I don't wanna do
Randomize
