tell ils to like buy her flowers and like a balloon that says, sorry I tried to fuck your sister. I think hallmark makes some of those cards too.
I heard Topanga got a DUI. I need that mugshot asap.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
i caught him jerking off, doing his SAT Prep. forever alone.
what's the name of that soccar player i bit again?
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
I just wanted to give you a heads up. There's a crab in the kitchen. He doesn't have a name yet. We are just calling him crab for now. Oh! and we have memosas!
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
Sat down on an escalator. That hungover.
I'm sad that I feel like I need to temporarily change your name in my phone from Smashley until you have the baby and can be unsober with us again.
We need to talk about your improper dealings with the town drug dealer.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
You're a mystery wrapped in an enigma wrapped in a redhead
My younger brother asked me "to stop fucking his girlfriends older sisters"
The hump and dump is a beautiful thing
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