And I just remember seeing him for the first time and being like, who is this ape of a man? Like legit he could be the missing link
how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
ugh he was not leaving in the morning so i tried to scare him by crying and saying i wasnt ready to lose my virginity.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Currently at a bar observing the mating patterns of drunken people in their 60s. This is hilariously terrifying. Hope he has Viagra.
I saw an episode of cops that had one of my ex husbands on it.
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Pooping in a box is not fun. You're not a cat.
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
Randomize
