Gfs sis is in town. Its awkwardly obv that we want to fuck each other.
Is it weird that I think of Ennis from Brokeback Mountain everytime I hear "Make em Say" by Master P? "I don't need your money. Huh." NA NA NA NAAA.
i wish there were pregnant emoticons
her dad's the mattress king, she's genetically engineered to be good in bed
you told his mom that the only thing he wants for christmas is his dick in your mouth
All she said was "the usual?" and unzipped my pants.
He warned me he may piss the bed. I'm oddly okay with this.
Do you think it'd be inappropriate to have an I'm Not Keeping My Baby Party the day after her baby shower?
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
I still feel like a bad person. A shoulder to cry on became a dick to suck.
Note to self: don't try to shave your legs when sex-sore. You CANT reach, stop trying.
He got hotter. I'm offended on behalf of the rest of our graduating year.
Is there a tactful way to ask "how are your balls?" Or do I just ask point blank
so i was thinking... those 6 am shots weren't really needed.
I just elbowed a roll of wrapping paper, and said “ohh sorry”. I’m still drunk.
Randomize
