no homo or anything but the way you were dancing with that girl gave me a boner
She has 2500 facebook friends. I probably should have used a condom.
wow, so sex, not that great its like masturbating with a warm towelette, like the kind you get at a japanese restaurant
I got my period while he was fingering me , I knew it because I never get that wet.
Did u at least say sorry?
She thinks she's a fairy, dude. A real fucking fairy with wings and shit.
We're making herpes jokes very loudly and hoping she notices.
Your cat is quite the conversationalist after some tequila and shrooms
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
I almost tried texting you with my pipe. Holy fuck this is good shit.
After a while I was so wet that I started crying. HE MADE ME SO HORNY I WEPT.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
I'm not over that dildo rifle story. I don't think I ever will be.
Trusting in Jesus is not a viable birth control plan.
He just blew a .079. Jesus loves him THAT much.
I am a taco. I am also really high.
I've always seen you more as a chimichanga.
Randomize
