it was a mass text i'm sorry
do you usually send 'hey sexy' as a mass text?
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
bruce springsteen sings some of the most romantic songs i've ever heard.
the hells wrong with u
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
New game: find the sober person in Tbell
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
It's barely 9 am & I've already had an ice cube IN my vagina
LOVE ME LIKE A KANGARO LOVES A POUCH YOU DUMB CUNT
Yes, let me tell you about the time I was forcibly locked in a bathroom when my ex-girlfriend was having a bad shroom trip.
I'm not even the least bit surprised that I whored myself out for tiramisu
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
Why are my jeans soaking wet and smell like chlorine??
Bc u told a stranger in the hotel "I have sinned' and made him get into the hotel fountain and "baptize u". I've got a vid
Dude, I'm pretty sure I just drank iced tea last night and yet I'm still hungover. What the fuck is my body anymore ?
Randomize
