He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
I submitted an essay to my history teacher comparing changes in the middle ages to the song changes by David Bowie. I can't wait to see my grade on that.
we saw a llama on the side of the road. That's when we knew everything was going to be alright.
I awoke this morning to a naked boyfriend flying a remote controlled shark around his apartment. This is my life.
I'm always drunk lately
Now I'm in a game of hide and seek in Sears
He's hot though. It's not like he JUST got out of prison. That was like months ago
Fighting the urge to throw up all over my little brothers jr high basketball bench. Welcome home aaron
I had 17 beers 2 days ago. I'm not dad material yet
I just sent Brandon a snapchat where I wasn't wearing a shirt but had a rooster drawn on my boobs that said "cock block" and laughed for 10 minutes I have problems don't judge me
"YOU ALWAYS BEEN A HOE YOU ALWAYS GONE BE A HOE. THAT'S JUST THE WAY IT'S GONE BE." overheard at temple
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
i just realized... if i ever hook up with someone on my bed, we'll be fucking atop my animated batman themed bedset.
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
The date did not go well. Turns out I once set her brother on fire.
My vagina! What have you done to it?
Blessed it my child.
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