That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
I've been thinking about it and if we ever have a threesome it'll start off with us clothed solely in our matching fur vests
I gave myself a pep talk in the library bathroom mirror. and then threw up in the sink.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
I bought you a small gift as a preemptive apology for being a drunken slut tonight.
True. On an unrelated note I helped post bail for both of our ex girlfriends last night. Russian roulette: guess which one is pregnant?
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
I'll be home soonish I need 4th of July sex, it's the American thing to do.
you can't get cum all over my hair and then tell me you just want to be friends
He showed me his scar from his appendix surgery. It was educational and fun....
Randomize
