And he tried to make it as casual as possible by asking where i was going on vacation while he was poundin me.
Yes stubble LOOKS hot but factor in his shitty bj skills and I might as well have jacked off with apricot scrub
5am, I am wayy too drunk for this. Hookers came out of nowhere. They're like ninjas. Some poor soul got the fat one, tomorrow's going to be interesting...
Her roomates have been scoring her hookups. I got 8.9, best of the week!
it's like my freshman wet dream come true
Just when I thought he had turned a new leaf, I see a "Let me get you pregnant" shirt in his closet
I picked up the bartender so he could open the bar early and ended up with him giving me a ride home when he closed. I like snowdays and everything, but they get really expensive. Also, I think I threw up on his front door. Not checking.
I don't believe in coincidence. I believe in the stars aligning perfectly to sodomise me in public. Who ever said I was cynical?
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
I think the "tmi" ship sailed a long time ago, and it took our dignities with it..
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Banged a guy with 2 broken arms once. Top that
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
