okay I'm thinking he doens't have a facebook...I'm on page 28 of Hunters
ok you need to stop NOW
her nose should be used as a dorsal fin
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
Let's just be mature adults about last night and never speak of it again.
you told me heaven would be the 3 of us at Moe's forever and every hot girl that walked in would ask us to play stone face
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
Upside of a two-day migraine: thanks to a prominent "E" in the middle of every pill, I think we can totally pass off Excedrine Migraine as ecstasy to stupid, drunk freshman. This is totally going to happen. That entrepreneurship course is paying off.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
I know we said we never would. But try fucking a fat guy. He put in so much more effort and then made me waffles.
Well she just asked a sorority girl if she should fuck her floor mate so it's basically like the blind leading the blind
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
Im drunk taking pregnancy tests with this really hot girl...i dont know what is happening
I just slept for fifteen hours straight. It's like my body knows i'm drinking with you and is preparing..
Guuuuurrrrrl! He ate the 🌮like it contained the Covid-19 vaccine!
Randomize
