too bad they don't have a 'people you may be able to do' thing on facebook. it would save me a lot of fucking time.
everyone who works at gamestop is basically destined to live with their parents for the rest of their lives... so i said no.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
it's 10:36pm. Do you know where your penis should be?
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
So I fucked her. If you're keeping score at home, it's all tied up with horrible sex with someone I like and great sex with someone I hate both with 1.
My life has become one weird ass game. No one wins. No one loses. We all just kind of hang in limbo and hope we don't die. Eskimo sisters for life. Please have sex with one of them.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
so serious though like its almost like I'm playing a game that's my life and Im always losing
I went up by the border of Canada. We took shrooms and went fishing...pretty sure we killed a dragon and ate it for dinner
As my straight cousin I need you to answer a question. Are the Astros a baseball team, and if so, are they good? This is flirting related and time-sensitive.
Most people would agree that it IS in fact slutty to give someone head for free ice cream.
your mom was just petting me...I am strangely comfortable with it
If that pentatonix bullshit is playing when I get home we're breaking up
Randomize
