he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
My choices this week make me realize that I need to copyright the term "cock buffet"
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
Its ok we found him,,, He is in the bathroom trying to write his life story on a roll of toilet paper.
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
If i ever have a kid with an outie i'm giving it up for adoption
I swear they were about to hook up!!
I know because I was in the tub taking an imaginary silent bath. They stopped cuz I gagged on my shot.
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
It's 11:13am and my chem prof is drinking a beer in class. I guess finals week is stressful for them too
I'm about to take my 7th shot and I have to to go to dinner with my grandma in an half hour. What is my life.
It's 4 am here and I just vomited myself awake....Not rising OR shining any time soon
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
If you needed to get laid tonight all you had to do was ask
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