Well, she's an atheist who is addicted to the Sims.
Who isn't?
i now know how you feel when you have to walk me home. she ran into a streetlight and into garbage.
She told me I should be a condom model.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
he paid for dinner at the eiffel tower. drinks at a bar on the champs elysees. gave me a motorcycle ride back to his house, got us heineken and then took me to park overlooking paris. where he ate me out on a park bench. still have doubts about the french?
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
Watching crazy stupid love and drinking alone isn't what I thought it was gonna be
Its TONS better. Expect a drunk dial at 11:54
Okay. But I hope it isn't expensive lingerie. Because I'm ripping it off Hulk Hogan style.
We watched Jurassic Park and they made me drink every time they saw or named a dinosaur. Do you know how many dinosaurs live in Jurassic Park? Lots.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
It was 6am and he went immediately for the 69. WTF?? 6am is WAY to early for acrobatics.
Looks like I'm not in the Ashly Madison files. But my wife is.
I’ve lost count of how many disciplines of science this conversation about Harry Potter has gone through.
Somehow, walking in on your drunk mom in a diaper was the least traumatic thing I saw last night
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