During sex he started singing that song in Forgetting Sarah Marshall--"Inside of You"--by Russell Brand
i think i just was awoken by the sound of my roommate choking on her boyfriend's dick
She made a list of the things each of us had done wrong and assigned a point system. Guess who came out the loser?
champagne bombs. Yes, i think that is where things may have gotten out of control.
I'm at the cafe. It's 7am. There is a girl I don't know on my futon who tried to tickle me this morning when I got down from my loft. I also not wearing any underwear.
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
There were slices of bread pasted to the wall with peanut butter this morning. I don't want to know
When I ask you to make sure no ones coming while I'm changing.. The logical friend would keep watch. But you my, best friend come stand in front of me and flash everybody.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
You can't call dibs on the bed... every time you party you KO in the bathtub
I gave him morning sex, a bag of cookies, and dropped him off at work. I believe I deserve the "best hookup award."
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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