hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
I just learned that your liver regrows itself every 2 months. Best news I've heard all week.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
So i closed my laptop as i started to fall off my bed and then i caught myself and realized that moment of catching myself is the difference between tuesday and friday.
I have no idea what happened after 2 AM. I woke up on my bike, in my bed, with a deep thigh bruise.
No idea. I woke up in the middle of the night to you drooling and gnawing on my arm. Then you rolled over, punched the air 4 times, then proceeded to talk about your hair in your sleep.
I woke up with a half eaten bag of lettuce in my hand, wearing my Halloween costume from last year. Damn you tequila.
Theres a 75% chance I'm wearing a hocky mask and nothing else right now
Ps I am
Are some dicks heavier than others? Random question as I'm feeling mine.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I swear I can't go out anymore. It's like he put a GPS in my dick. I don't know if I should feel awkward or proud...
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
I just had sex on a roof
No. Every time we go there, you end up getting high, then lost, then going home with strangers.
she compared me favorably to her vibrator
which one?
Randomize
