apparently people get pissed when you take the bag of wine out of the franzia box and put it in your purse before leaving the party
I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
day 8: i just gave goat a piece of pineapple soaked in rum. as an animal science major, im ashamed. as a normal person, it was awesome.
Just saw a woman with a Pomeranian in her bra. Way to step up your game Seattle.
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
She kept sniffing my sweater and tried to guess what type of detergent I use.
Last time I went to flagstaff I threw up in my beard. I would very much like to recreate that moment.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
Apparently "I have the beer shits" isn't the excuse my boss wanted to hear. So sue me
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
I'll have sex with you for tacos. I don't care, man.
I'm fine w planning around your penis prospecting. Saturday it is.
We stood outside the room listening to them have sex and making meow noises
That's not right, is it?
it was weird i started the party in just my underwear and woke up in my clothes
Randomize
