Dude why does my asshole itch so bad?
I'll teach you how to wipe better
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
it's like iHOP with fire
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
If I have to take him to the hospital, I'm drawing dicks on his face
You are beautiful! I got thrown out of a bar tonight for throwing my shoe. It was at my sister, I don't know why they were mad. I know her.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
Got a stripper to howl at my wolf shirt.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
He just showed me a video of his erect penis moving to the beet of the music when he was high, I think I'm in love.
just saw someone climb out of the dumpster at cvs and start walking down the street like it was completely normal
Safe to say I relapsed into my old chatroulette drunk flashing days.
Because selling drugs to kids never goes out of business. We get older, they stay the same stupid.
was I atleast graceful when I feel down that flight of stairs and broke my hand?
Lighting a fucking bong with a candle. Straight up dedication.
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