just threw up in the bus full of other international students just outside of boulder, just keeping the aussie reputation alive
arguing about whether his trip to england or my trip on acid was better
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
theres still like 7 beers in the gutter from the roof party we had last night. i dont know how we got up there. but we need to get those beers down.
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I wish I could like. Pull my liver out, and put it in the corner of a boxing ring, put a towel and ice on it, rub it's shoulders, and tell it to "get back in there, you got this!".
I was to the point where my socks were drenched in ranch dressing
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
It's funny to me the only time that you clean up is when your weed delivery man is on the way.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
I tried to settle their lesbian roommate fight by turning on Pretty Wild
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I paper cut my nipple reading mail topless
I woke up to a bum peeing outside my window, and he said, "This is embarrassing for you."
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