Buying weed on Christmas. Gotta love Jewish drug dealers
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
you're letting him buy you a plane ticket...to kentucky...so you can fuck him?
i know. i'm only adding to the interstate sex trade problem.
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Just headbutted a photographer. This convention just got really interesting.
Well I blew a guy I barely know in full view of a homeless camp. That's pretty tame for me.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Getting my nails done with Diana... I'm going for the keep your friends close and the girl who's dating the guy you want to fuck closer
First time at a gay bar. I found a surrogate AND sperm donor! The surrogate is straight, so it evens out.
You are a lesbian wizard with red hair. You are willow
You kept trying to make people drink "salsa-ritas." But all you did was dump tequila in a half full jar of salsa, and shove it in people's faces while shouting at them.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Mind if I sleep with your cousin? If I can... thanks. If no, sorry its gonna happen.
We drunkenly made out once four years ago and then he immediately vomited and honestly I've never gotten over him
I FOUND A VIBRATOR IN MY BABY BROTHERS ROOM. IM FREAKIN OUT MAN ITS BIGGER THEN MINE
put it back and chill out ok
NO FUCK HES 15 WHO EVEN SOLD HIM THAT HES A BABY
Randomize