I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
I just spent an unhealthy amount of money overnighting a full adult sized Trix Rabbit Halloween costume
of course. lets lasso hookers.
just realized i can abbreviate thomas paine as t pain in poli theory class notes....YES
You act as if I'm the first person to pee in the Taco Bell drive thru at 2 AM, I'm sure a lot worse things have happen in that drive thru than my urine.
Aaaand I cut your bangs with a large knife last night ...
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
I found your knife. It was stuck in my bedroom ceiling.
I have managed to reach the 'after meth poster look' before lunch here...
The bald guy bought me a shot so I chugged it and then walked out to the middle of the dance floor and told an old woman that might be your moms twin to bend it over...We didn't end on a good note though. Dude she stepped on my vans.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
stop fucking thinking about him when there is A MILLION OTHER PENISES TO RIDE IN THE WORLD
Dick is the cure to depression. I'm almost positive. And cough syrup.
Found Ryan’s keys in the fridge. On my way back.
Also, tell him he missed Nathan passing out in the dryer.
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