over or under 1pm before my bracket is too blurry to read?
im sorry, I just can't fuck a guy who can't receive picture messages
I'm finding that as the end of the quarter approaches, the list of things I refuse to do sober keeps getting longer.
I just saw my first passed out person, sprawled out on the sidewalk like they died. I wanted to take a pic but I thought that screamed "tourist"
I drunken agreed to go wedding dress shopping with a stranger at the bar yesterday. She sent me an email asking what days I am free.
i ordered 6 shots "to go" what did you think was going to happen!
I'm at some strange place in what feels like Mexico, high and getting tacos.
the fact that you have a guy named the "i want you to tie me up and fuck me" guy speaks volumes about your life.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
If I had a vagina, my apartment would have been the Atlantic
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
He caught me shoving meatballs into my mouth using my hand. Fuck utensils. It’s Christmas...and this is why I’m single.
They are good meatballs.
I like shiny stuff tho if that’s an emotion
You made me take you back to Mcdonalds so you could yell at the guy for not giving you enough ketchup packets
I vaguely recall french fries...
You then proceeded to call your mom and tell her you weren't coming home because you were "tripping balls"
Sweet...
Randomize