Cool, I just put that together. I didn't know if using a tie-died sub machinegun was too crazy
At what point did we cease to have vaginas?
Sometime in the sweat pants phase freshman year.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
my life is one jail cell away from being a bad country music song.
If there is a god, you will have pink eye tomorrow.
I am too drunk to be out in this weather around all these animals.
Don't blame me. I told you I didn't know if I had a key to those hancuffs.
This 35 year old just told me that he was headed to the dance floor and it was about to get real dangerous......was that an invite?
I have tan lines from my nipple rings.
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
I someohow managed to lose my butt plug in tne midst of moving to B.C. and I am not a happy camper.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
She's still here. My penis can feel it.
Dude, I think she left with some dude like an hour ago
FOUND HER. I swear this thing is like a metal-detector
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