You're going to have to start masturbating with your left hand. Or with someone's vagina
You love popeyes more than me
does delicious chicken come out of your vagina?
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
girl next to me is signing up for tough love. definitely getting laid.
he doesnt exactly give off the "im mature enough to use my penis" vibe
it glows. i had to have it.
So....maintenance found the bullethole.....
Its like "fucckkkkk yooouuuuuu" is echoing up my esophagus
tequila?
yep
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
I can't even remember the last time I took my own pants off
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
should we try and roll a cross joint since its good friday? you know, for jesus
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
Randomize
