Someone apparently named 'eleaw' just text me asking if I had fun last night.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
thanks for at least making it out of the pool before you threw up
I'm sitting next to some random guy in a gorilla suit drinking out of a bottle of vodka.
He's majoring in Religion
She was kinda cute. So long as you don't mind neck tattoos and bad life choices.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
Haha he was not a poor little guy. If he'd talked to me or something I might feel bad. But since I saw him groping other girls as well as myself there's no sympathy coming from me
He's just picking out the right girl. I do the same thing with fruit. Grope them, squeeze them, smell them. I have to know I'm getting quality fruit.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
After we hooked up he started to cry and called his mom and told her he wanted to marry me
His condition for us having sex was that I wore my show boots. #equestrianproblems
He woke me up at 6:30 to have sex again and afterwards, he didn't even judge me when I asked him if he wanted some rum. I think I found my soulmate.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
Got drunk tryed walking 12miles to zacks house woke up at noon on baseball park
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
We got stoned and watched Disney movies all night. I think I'm in love.
Randomize