dude you need to get laid
me?
no, the other guy who hasn't been laid in 7 months
oh I thought you were talkin about me
wait
we just watched the ball drop on the spanish channel. best mistake of my life.
He freaked out when I started to orgasm. He said he never knew girls could orgasm too.
Her life is proof that being a drunken slut will get you places.
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
He appeared on my 7th floor fire escape and sang to me and jimmy through the window when we fucked. He's like a drunken mix of Sinatra and Spiderman.
We had car sex in the parking lot of the dispensery while he blasted Tony Bennett. It was so fucking romantic.
got one for peeing in public....called the cop a donut dunking communist...should be a fun court appearance
I got so stoned last night I thought I was in second grade again
Okay so.. What's with me and guys who have more than 2 nipples
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
Who would you rather hang with tonight, drunk me or high me?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Just had an orgasim to the Star Spangled Banner so.. it was all worth it.
Remeber when we went camping and fucked those two guys? Yeah me either but I'm covered in poison oak so I'm guessing it's from that.
Randomize
