He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
DUDE. I'm missing my big toenail. My bed has blood all over it. WHAT DID WE DO LAST NIGHT?
I don't know, but I chipped my tooth and I'm wearing different underwear.
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
so i decided not to tell her that her fiance is cheating since i already bought the bridesmaid dess
Come over we're drinking with orange soda as a chaser to honor 90s nick kenan and kel.
i admit it was a weird experience, but why regret what once made you cum
Let's paint friendship bongs
Small children cheering my name. I am not a decent enough human being to feel comfortable with this.
By the way if you come home and I'm not wearing pants, just go with it. I didn't have the energy to go searching for some.
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
Can you rollerblade?
No, why?
Honestly, I was high and picturing us roller blading together. I wanted to see if I could make my dreams a reality.
I don't know if should be sitting on a toilet or kneeling in front of it
You had 10 drinks. On a first date.
I just masterbated then started bawling.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Randomize