I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
Yes give me all the cream and he's gone
God dammit. Now I'm pissed at Arizona, while feeling bad for my poor, poor penis.
Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I love how you send me nude pics of girls you're fucking and name them by which city they're in instead of their name. "This is Nashville, this is Tupelo, this is Jackson..."
just saw a girl who had one of those monogrammed backpacks... her initials are VAG. is this a sign?
tailgaiting my last final, a perfect sendoff.
he said he got tested two months ago... he goes with his whole family.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
Let's go one conversation without mentioning cats or alcohol someday.
Yeah play it cool maybe put in a kissy face though let him know you're giving an invitation for his dick
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
I'm sorry I lead life with my vagina.
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
When i was leaving for work this morning, i realized the neighbor was passed out drunk, with no pants, and a half eaten whopper on my lawn. Knowing that hey..we have all been there before.. i decided to give him a pillow and a blanket rather than wake him up.
Randomize
