It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
The only problem is i have violated all potential new years resolutions at the new years party.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
As i was walking home this morning some old lady was walking her dog and i said hello to her as our paths in life met, then i proceeded to puke in someones front yard and never looked back
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
She stopped laughing and kind of stared at the wall for a while. Then she did 3 somersaults and said she saw jesus. This weed is fucking fantastic.
You lifted he top layer off his birthday cake and made it say 'eat me' in the cookie monster voice so yeah he knew.
My vday gift was a joint bouquet, Finding Nemo on bluray, and a good shower fuck.
Um, WHAT A FUCKING KEEPER!
When the strippers start dancing to Christmas songs it's time to get the fuck out!
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
They should make eskimo sister bracelets. OMG WE NEED BRACELETS WITH IGLOOS ON THEM.
I have acquired a mango...tonight is successful so far
Her name is susan
If you think me talking about that hot guy accepting my LinkedIn request is pornographic, I’m not sure how you’re gonna feel when I tell you I fucked a stranger on a park bench last weekend
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