My hair reeks of homosexuality.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
everyday i become more and more impressed with my facebook stalking skills
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
We hotboxed his closet and accidentally lit some of his shirts on fire... do we have a fire extinguisher?
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Went out with the family last night and some 40 yr old lady wanted to take me home. My mom was not happy with me
Being hungover in this office is the actual worst. Like they look at me and know I was wasted at 1 am, karaokeing Billy Idol at a gay bar.
i just need to find someone who enjoys eating frozen waffles as much as I do. It will be perfect.
I'm laughing at the fact that I'm at Target right now buying vitamins and alcohol.
Dude I just clenched/unclenched my hindquarters while looking in the mirror I have fucking talent
THIS IS NOT A LAUGHING MATTER, CAITLIN. MY PARENTS ARE FUCKING. LOUDLY.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
