I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Just washed my feet between classes in the bathroom...Four girls totally judged me...
we managed to turn Dream Phone into a drinking game. don't hate.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
You know, last years football game was epic, but seeing the same girl that gave you a bj in the parking lot, in the same parking spot...that's fate.
I poured everyones drinks into the ice bucket and then stuck my face in it. Apparently I'm a greedy drunk.
i decided if i had to, i could survive with only 3 fingers on each hand.
Will it make you feel better if we wear the title of dysfunctional fucking roommates? It requires monogamy unless we want to bang someone together.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
When in doubt, it's too much cheese
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
If one more dude who finds out I'm a cop asks to see me in uniform I'm gonna become asexual
You know that thing where you wouldn't typically eat ass but you're in love with him so you want to eat his ass, because it's HIS ass
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
it will be a surprise...all I can say is stripper clown.
Randomize
