It's just you. You wear the fuck me fedora and wear baller shorts, hollywood hippie who thinks she is shakira when she's drunk.
I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
He tried to pick up a girl by telling her about his homosexual experience in high school.
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I mean besides the fact someone got stabbed, I still had a pretty good night.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
Honestly I think at this point I purposefully schedule nothing on Sundays anymore so I can spend all day wallowing in my shame.
Why the hell did you invite him? He's gonna bring two more inches of dick and zero fun.
I think all the stress in my life right now can be directly correlated with never winning a game of Bop It as a child.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
She mentions her boyfriend one more time, I'm taking her home and breaking that shit up.
Well you should have thought of that before you were reckless with your butt
You're breaking my sexual little heart
IS NO AN EMOTION BECAUSE THAT'S WHAT I'M FEELING RIGHT NOW
Fuck you, i'm all jacked up on bananas lets go somewhere
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