S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
I'm taking this break up pretty rough.. I've never been to sad to masturbate.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
They better not charge my debit card for what you peed on.
We're having soft pretzels and cheese dip for dinner tonight. Like fucking adults.
Ran into him again last night, stole his glowstick and walked away. The glowstick mountain in my room keeps growing.
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
You both snapchatted me that. Like, I just got a double dose of penis pastry.
I don't know how much expertise I could offer. My best advice is, "don't drown, for god's sake don't drown"
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
Well, he pretended he was climbing me like he was a monkey and I was a tree during sex.
so it turns out that when you ride the subway drunk at 5 am you wake up with a sailor in your bed
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
I cam home to find him twitching on the floor, surrounded by unopened condoms and covered in cranberry sauce (yes I tasted it) while Thundercats was playing.
Randomize
