I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
I did something last night that I shouldn't have, but I don't want to tell you because you'll probably just make it your fb status...
I see you've learned your lesson.
I puked in the pool and didn't tell them, then they all went swimming. Is it dick to just sit back and enjoy the show?
I tried to roll down the stairs in a ball. I have bruises, the pain is too much.
What the fuck, why would you ever do that?
Haven't you ever just wanted to be a ball?
I don't miss having sex with him. We had our finale fuck last week. He's all yours now.
You know it's last call at a gay bar when the guys at the urinal are just jacking off in front of each other. Most awkward pissing moment of my life.
There are only four things in life that are certain. 1 Death, 2 Taxes, 3 The wu tang clan aint nothin to fuck with, and 4 you will never be more important than taco bell
My wife just tried to justify to me why she wants to bring a girl into bed with us. I should win an academy award for my face and response of 'well of its what you need.'
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
doing the walk of shame back to your house in nothing but a bed sheet was definitely not one of my proudest moments..
someone stole all your weed so you told us you were planning each of our deaths
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
That was years ago. And it was chlamydia.
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
