He said he was just looking at my pictures and was thinking about how he wanted to cut my hair..then dye it black and put platnium blonde extensions throughout it and layer my hair
Whore.
I was being facetious
Don't try to hide behind big words.
just overheard a conversation that ended in "and that's what I learned in France" How could that not have been about sex
if you count grabbing my crotch as an introduction then yeah i got a couple of those tonight
And I know a few people wouldnt want to even be around high people. Which is sad. But jet packs are cool.
Just had a nice conversation with my landlord while cleaning your puke off my car
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
1. They have gold fish races every wednesday. 2. They have a redbull vodka slushie. We need to visit this place.
1. My fish will beat your fish. 2. Were getting fucked up
That's exactly how my pussy feels when I shave it. Like a cross between a naked mole rat and a newborn child. Embrace it.
omg i just made best friends with a deer. Im like the drunk santa clause.
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
I find it weird that you'll let me in your vagina, but not your house
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
his mom walked in while he was eating me out. and my vag was facing the door. luckily his face was in it.
Randomize