About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
There are GROWN MEN with fake HP wands flinging curses at me in Walmart.
That's funny. Are they weird looking???
OF COURSE THEY ARE WEIRD LOOKING, THEY ARE STALKING ME IN WALMART. WITH. FAKE. WANDS.
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
I'm so high I feel like I'm pedaling a bicycle but I'm laying on the couch. My body might be vibrating. I made soup.
And drunk me decided to play keep away with sober me's dignity
I always hoped that one day I'd have a sex position named in my honor.
We shaved off his eyebrows I'm pretty sure his fiance will be thrilled at the wedding
Now I know he's not trying to fuck me. He took me to lunch at White Castle.
I want you inside of me and on top of me and under me and behind me
Basically I need you to be like god, just fucking everywhere
I'm gonna rob all up in that cradle
I wonder if the fact that I'm listening to the theme from lion king gives my neighbors the impression that im tripping faceeeee
Why did you have to tell me he has a hammer cock? Now I can’t stop staring at his pants.
Last time i cooked this high i tried to makw bacon amd then burned myselfbon the grill, only to realize 25min latwr when the bacon wouldnt cook that the grill wasn't on. I IMAGINED the burn.
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