I found the seven page love letter I had written you. I'm sorry i was so obsessed.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
Not till Sunday. I'm going to sleep in my car. And I know. This place is insane. Blood on the stAirs 5 dollar slices of pizza. A girl on our floor had a stroke.
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
in my defense, he kept drinking all of my water.
he had diabetes and you told him to stop being a pansy!
Successfully masturbated while balancing on an exercise ball. my greatest accomplishment?
Probably
For sure. Gotta go. Building an igloo.
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
How do you leave a condom wrapper under my mom's pillow...
This may not be the best moment to laugh, but I am.
you were bawling because you felt bad for being so drunk and then you asked for a beer
I just wanna have sex and go to Denny's after is that too much to ask for.
I just had a flashback to us shaking up Gatorade mix and then inhaling it in your kitchen because it was funny. Now I can't stop laughing in work because that is the stupidest shit.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Yesterday I febreezed my bed in between gentleman callers
Randomize
