Having a random hookup so left but love u
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
he walked in on you at the party drunkenly dancing alone on the bed wearing mardi gras beads, sunglasses, and using one ski pole as a microphone.... and you STILL got laid. i dont get your life.
She's a Laker fan, her sister is a Celtic fan... no matter who wins I'm getting a celebration bj from one of them!
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
I found out why they kept calling her "CD". It was short for "Crab Dip". You're fucked.
he went to find a bathroom and came back 10 minutes later with a fifth of bacardi, a pack of cigarettes, and two funnel cakes. he is a man among boys.
Megan brought her friend up last night, greeted her by drunkedly taking a piss all over her duffle bag of clothing
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
Also, I pretty much need an IV of fluids straight to my soul
He says it takes a lot to subdue the urge to just bury his face in my vagina. Of course, I have absolutely no problem with this.
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
and that's when you shouted "ahh motherland" as you streaked down hall 4B
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
