In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
nothing like a negative hiv test and a bag of condoms to brighten my day.
He thinks MY vagina is tight. That's saying something.
Best thing law school has taught me: how to use logic to turn a girls "no I will not have sex with you" into "well I might as well get laid"
If we get out of this alive, I'm never going to a Denny's at 3 am again.
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
Ye. Looking like it's about to be one of those mythical responsible weekends
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
I've come to the conclusion all of your awkward and complicated male encounters could easily be intercepted by a man town Yankee candle and a vibrator. Sleep on that tell me your thoughts in the morning. Sweet dreams.
The last thing I remember is talking to the firefighter next to me and he was giving me fruit.
She showed up at 4:30 in the morning HAMMERED, stripped, demanded sex, then after 4 failed attempts stopped me mid-thrust to tell me she thought we should be fucking for a cause, like animal rights. Process that for a second. She wanted us to be fucking for animal rights.
I woke up with masking tape on my nipples this morning........... WHY DO BAD THINGS HAPPEN TO GOOD PEOPLE
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Randomize
