I'm ready for this little girl to leave so I can hit the bong already
with your flexibility, and the size of my penis, amazing things are possible.
Someone just took a shot from my crotch. I should not have to drive home
This has been the most pleasant arrest experience I've ever had.
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I kinda wanna eat your hands right now.
Put down the everclear and go to bed.
I think I'm dead. Why did I think it was a good idea to hang from the banister while someone poured liquor into my mouth?
Come to wine Wednesday bro. We have a fog machine
I just passed a kid trying to leave on a lawn mower
A good drinking club with a running problem, improves endurance in both I have observed this evening.
2 for 1 beer results in multiples of 2 so what should be a beer or two becomes 4 or 6. But running, alleviates the need for a DD.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
we were all too drunk to realize that the cat wasnt yours
Just ate 2 pieces of pizza in the shower.. New low or fuckin brilliant??
1 fuck you 2 fuck her 3 ur forgiven 4 im breaking up with her
Randomize
